Missing him
22:56:44 | 2001-03-10
I miss him more and more everyday. Love lost at such a cost, I just want things that won't get lost. Like a coin that won't get tossed. Jared called me last night again and we didn't talk for long. My teeth, well that same molar has been bothering me again. It all happened last night...same pain, all night long. i went to the ER early this morning to get more Codein. I had werk today too and it was so bad...alot of people came and saw me. Ricky brought me my favorite kinda gum...Watermelon bubblicious. Too bad I can't chew it, still, it's the thought that counts. I still don't know what to do about Jared. i love him...I know i do...and now, I don't want to be with anyone else in this world. I want to be with him so bad....and its not fair to either of us to break up on these kind of terms. I htink about moving to Ohio everyday...I love my friends....I do....but I can't stop thinking about Jared...i have to wonder if he is the one....or one of the ones. I don't know....I wish so much we could talk more...I wish I knew more how he felt. It would be one thing if one of us didn't like one of us as much but neither of us know. Nothing in my life is going right.....I have tons of guy friends...not as many gurl friends...i have a serious boyfriend...but we live 16 hours away and we're in a tough situation right now, my car is well dead, the rental car is well breakless, and my teeth hurt so bad that all I can do is cry. And what makes things worse, I still don't know how to solve anything. I want to talk to someone so bad...I want to talk to Jared, I want to ask him every question I have in my mind. Nothing makes sence...nothing. I bedder go....pop a couple more pills. later