another day
09:57 p.m. | 2001-03-22
Sometimes things happen in my life that are worth being said......others...are worth it but are never revealed. Alot of things about me are confusing.....and I realize that. I will always be searching for who I really am....and as for anyone in this situation, it isn't easy. I*m a senior this year, a senior in High School, and from what I thought and from what I have seen over the years I was completly misleaded on what ths year would be like. So far, I have realized more then anything that after this is all over...I may not come up being the same person I thought I was, i may have more enemies, and I may not have a friend in the world. Right now, my best friend is me. And for awhile I never thought that, that was enough. But really, as long as I do have something that's all that matters. I don't need a boyfriend, I don't need 5 girls walking with me gossiping down the hallways, or the crown to show people how popular i really am. Because after all this is over I will be no better than anyone else who has done it all before...and long before me. Tears can roll down my cheeks, and I can take long walks leading no where for as long as I need to. Alot of things are confusing right now, and I wish I could say I am on that path to finding myself out there. But, honestly, I can't. There's no doubt in my mind that i will lose things throughout but atleast i can find out what I want and what's best for me. i*m gonna make it....and sooner or later I*ll fill out those Apps. for college...and hey, maybe I*ll even go. I*ll grow up one of these days, and then I*ll get a job, and i*ll be happy, and then maybe...maybe i'll come back home. None of this makes sence, hell my life doesn't make sence, why would I think me trying to explain it would make any sence. This is it....and this is the way things may be for awhile. Sometimes i feel like I*ve lost everything that has meant anything to me....and other times...i think there's more. i*m afraid to find out if i am making any right decisions..I'm still waiting for something to happen. But life has been such a wild adventure so far, and I feel as though I am a million little pieces of everything I have seen. And I've seen a lot and it's all been ca-razy.....but as long as I know I am learning from my mistakes i think I*ll be okay. Well gonna go to bed....XOXO Now that she's back in the atmosphere With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey She acts like summer and walks like rain Reminds me that there's time to change, hey, hey Since the return from her stay on the moon She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey Tell me did you sail across the sun Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded And that heaven is overrated Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star One without a permanent scar And did you miss me while you were looking at yourself out there Now that she's back from that soul vacation Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo Reminds me that there's time to grow, hey, hey Now that she's back in the atmosphere I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day And head back to the Milky Way And tell me, did Venus blow your mind Was it everything you wanted to find And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day And head back toward the Milky Way