I*ve lost
20:58:49 | 2000-09-25
I*m not going to get into how it all happened but last Friday, September 22 2000...I came drove home from my tanning appointment after skewl to find someone i dearly loved dead. She died of a stroke and i guess it doesn*t really matter when or why, what matters is...she was a person...she was my neighbor...she was my friend. I don*t remember how it all happened and really i don*t want to...I*m writing this to you now becuz i am saying goodbye...Sitting on my stairs outside my front door i cried...I cried for her and i cried for myself. I cried so hard i managed to lose a contact lens, and as the cool breeze touched my face on that hot day I remembered her...I remembered her talking, I remembered her laugh and smile..most of all I remembered her presence. She was always around and always sitting in that white plastic chair on her front lawn. She was there when I was born, she was there when I got my first bike, she was there when I got my car, she was there when I brought home my crashed car, she was there on the warm summer days when I would run thru the sprinkler, she was there when I would pile up boards and nail them together to build a tree house. She look out for me and she watched. I only knew her as Grandma Rocky....Her real name was Eileen. I gues sit doesn*t matter...I meet peopel al lthe time and just remember them for who they are to me...Grandma rocky was special and loved by all...and I will never forget that woman....my street will never forget her.....and my life will never be the same with out her. I needed to write this becuz today I went to her funeral. I sat there and wanted to say something but something kept me from speaking outloud....instead, I said it to myself and now i am writing it. I may not show the hurt now...not as much or ever...i am hurt...I am sad...and it doesn*t matter how much or when or why...what matters is her...she was a friend to me and i sincerely hope she is happy...wherever she is. I will pray for her....and think of her always, and on those warm summer daze wherever i am...i will remember her...there in her yard sitting in that white plastic chair watching the kids play, watching her many grandchildren, smiling, and laughing...this is how i will forever remember her...in my mind...and in my heart. I love you Grandma Rocky....and you will never be forgotten.....XOXOXOXO